The Slovakian Guy


So I had my date with the Slovakian Guy last night. I actually had really high hopes for this date. He had seemed totally cool when we had chatted. He was adventurous, had traveled a lot, his profile stated (“stated” being the operative word here) that he had been to college and worked in property (I was to find that this occupation was a landscape gardener – an occupation I thought was somewhat twisting the confines of being  within  the property industry).

He took complete charge of the date – which I really like in a guy – and had decided to pick me up and take us both to Brighton-Le-Sands – a beach about 15 minutes drives outside of Sydney with lots of cafes and bars. Upon realizing my concern that I was somewhat uncomfortable with being picked up by a complete stranger (!), we agreed that we would meet at Darling Harbor in the city.

I was – again – disappointed when I first saw him. He described himself as being 5’10” – so being 5’6″ myself – I was never expecting Goliath – but… yeah… he definitely WAS NOT 5’10”.  You might think I am being quite bitchy and picky about the whole height thing – but the truth is – I like my big guys!

Also – there was a limp issue.

He was a really sweet guy though. We went to a nice Indian restaurant on the harbor and the conversation was good – had a little trouble understanding his Slovakian/Australian accent – but for the most part it was okay. We always had something to talk about which was great.

After the restaurant, we headed to Bungalow 8 – a bar on the harbor front – and chatted for another couple of hours. Following that we finished up by going to a club in the city – where we stayed until 5am.

This club was where the awkward situation occurred. Picture the scene: we are getting along great, absolutely no physical attraction on my part though (ABSOLUTELY NO PHYSICAL ATTRACTION!)  but I am enjoying his company – and he leans in for a kiss. Well actually – he had tried earlier in the night but his kiss had landed haphazardly on my cheek when I unexpectantly turned my head – but this time … I JUST PANICKED! I kissed him back.

It was like making out with a cut cantaloupe. That’s when I knew that no matter how great the conversation ever got between us – The Slovakian Guy and I would never work out.

On a side note – I think “Fishing for … fish!” needs a Kiss-O-Meter widget. Also – The Scarface Guy messaged me asking for another date. I didn’t reply.


First Date – The Scarface Guy


I joined the dating website about five days ago. I didn’t spend that much time setting up my profile – preferring instead to seem chilled out and relaxed. I added three pictures that I thought expressed my fun, adventurous and sociable characteristics. I wrote briefly about how I love to laugh and described myself simply – pretty eyes, pale skin and long, dark hair. I also described what I would like to do on a first date – something relaxed … a stuffy and awkward dinner is definitely a “no-no”  for me!

Having received some 200 emails from guys in these first few days – I must admit that the vast majority were banished to the trash bin upon quick inspection of their profiles. Some never even made it that far as something tells me that I will probably never find love with a man who’s first greeting goes something along the lines of  “Heya babes! Do you spit or swalow? (sic)” …. *DELETE!!!*

Anyway – I have ended up messaging back and enjoying conversations with a couple of nice guys at this stage. So Date#1 messaged me first. He complimented me on my pictures in the first message – which is always a good sign as it shows that they have actually looked at and read your profile and thought about contacting you – rather than copying and pasting a message to every girl that they come across that looks mildly fuckable. I messaged back because I thought that he looked like Manny from the movie “Scarface”.

One of the first things he asked me were my interests and what I did in my spare time. He just went straight in there! I mentioned the usual – reading, cooking blah blah blah. He then said something along the lines of “we share similar interests” – just point blank like that. Making this comment made me think that he was very matter-of-fact person – probably someone who wants to have a relationship because he thinks that he SHOULD have one – not because he emotionally wants to feel a deep connection with another human being.

We decided to meet for a quiet coffee after we both finished work. We were both late for our 6.30pm meeting – him being five minutes later than I was. Upon first sight I was disappointed with what I saw – perhaps noticeably so. Barely taller than I was, he was quite thin and fidgety – apologizing profusely for his scruffiness as he had just finished work.

We both had a large hot chocolate each and sat down at a small table beside the shop door. I think from first sight, he was just as disinterested in me as I was in him. Our conversation touched somewhat half-heartedly on the topics one expects to talk about on a first date. He had drank his large hot chocolate within a couple of minutes and then proceeded to fidget with the paper cup until I put him out of his misery and glugged up the last dregs of my own drink.

Parting ways outside the coffee shop – I thanked him for the drink and he thanked me for the conversation.